“Shivers”

Okay take it for what it’s worth and no butt hurt is meant to anyone but I do not get the whole fetish thing.  I mean I totally understand certain sexual things turn people on.  I think sex is supposed to turn people on and there is a healthy level and naughty can still be healthy.  However, there is a dark side that may not be a healthy place to play.  It seems when someone cross that boundary they almost give themselves over to a level of lust that is creepy.  Naughty becomes nasty, chat feels like your being manipulated.  Ever talk to someone that wears their fetish like a badge of honor?  No matter the discussion it gets steered to serve their lust.  You are chatting away and he asks how Hawaii was.  My response I loved it.  His response I’ll bet your feet looked so delicious.  I mean come on!  That is a pretty tame example, but really do I want to hear from a guy with a foot fetish that my feet probably looked delicious.  “Shivers”  Yeah it is disturbing.  This may come as a total surprise to many but normal guys are actually a real turn on.  Normal guys like sex, are horny, but they walk on the healthy side of naughty.  The flirty comments come as well but without the shivers.  It’s okay to have something turn you on but don’t let it consume you to the point it controls you.  When your needs become selfish and you don’t know the difference between a normal conversation and the perceived impression that a chat is an invitation to get you off you may need some help.  We are like a frozen stick of butter.  Heat us up a little and it’s awesome.  Nuke us too long and you got nothing to spread.  👻

Scarcity 

I was chatting with a friend today and we were discussing chat rooms.  I asked him what he thought of the List and he offered some great feedback.  As a former moderator he definitely has some great insight.  He brought up the fact that there is not a lot of women in the room.  I mentioned there isn’t a lot of women in most rooms.  For what it is worth here is my thoughts.  First, one thing men do not understand is women like to chat in a group setting.  Men for obvious reasons want to get into a PM.  So the ultimate irony is men want more women to chat with but the first chance they get a girl alone they take it.  This creates a scarcity of girls.  Simple supply and demand sexanomics.  High demand, low supply.  Second off is no guys want to invite their girl contacts to any room. The scarcity mentality of I have my girls I chat with and I don’t want to expose them to other guys.  I’ll try and debunk a few of these paradigms.  

First off we really like to chat with guys in the main room.  (Second time I have mentioned this in this post.  It’s important and true.)  If you want to build trust and PM more become active in the main room and your PMs will become plentiful.  We are not overly excited to chat with the lurkers.  Second invite girls.  Girls like active rooms because of the first reason.  (Third mention.  It must be important.). More active + inviting girls = more fun for everyone.  Third don’t worry about hooking up or getting off.  Have fun just for the sake of fun.  You may find that creating a great place to chat will make all your dreams come true.  You would not believe how many guys leave the room and I ask them why.  Guess what the response is?  Wasting my time I want to hook up.  Personally I think most will continue to strike out with that attitude.  Sends a pretty powerful message to me of intentions.  I even had one guy say to me we PM anyway so I don’t need the room.  For those that know me I’ll let you guess how available I have made myself to him.  Paradise isn’t made for us, we make paradise.  Same holds true for a little chat room like the List or any other.  Want something great, make it great.  Want more women, invite more women.  Chat, have fun, then you can tell someone this is where you want to be.  I have done my part in creating a fun place, now I need help in making it the place everyone wants to be.  🙂