We seem to all be running around after busy kids and all the things in life demanding our attention. Sometimes it seems we are too tired or do not have enough time for sex or its a quickie so we can fall asleep. I like everyone face those same challenges of priorities every day. We all have only 24 hours in a day. Frankly if I could I would make a day 28 hours. I could really use 4 more. :). I will say this though. Making time for some play with your guy or fwb is so worth it. Not just enough time to do it but time to really play. Like make out, touch, tease, oral, couple positions, etc. You can get off more than once just need to stay awake guys. Give us a chance. I’m not saying every time you have to block out a few hours but make sure you are doing it at least once a week. Play time is like truly the best time of your week. Don’t put it to the bottom of your list. It will improve all aspects of your life. Everything. I think in today’s world that has so much to offer its not necessarily a choice between good and bad. It’s more often the choice between good good better best. Those are the confusing decisions when you have lots of good choices. Make sure you create enough time for that which matters most. Even if you lose some sleep those midnight rendezvous or afternoon delights will a relationship make. xoxoxo Angie
I can’t remember if I have touched on this before. It just seems many I am coming across are having relationship issues. It is sad to me how many couples fall out of like with each other. You start out with this high level of like and you fall in love. It is wonderful and there are butterflies in your stomach when you see each other. Your heart beats fast and it’s true love. Often that early love leads to marriage and the journey begins.
Life is not always happily ever after.
Seems that after a period of time passes the honeymoon ends. Real life starts to sink in as the demands of jobs, kids, etc make their clam and we “grow” up. I don’t think it’s really growing up I think we just find it easier to take care of those other things. We tend to take for granted those we care the most about. With enough neglect even the best marriages suffer. Deny a husband intimacy or a wife romance mixed with the demands of “life” and you find yourself not really liking each other anymore. You may love your spouse. You may be willing to sacrifice and die for your spouse. Problem is you won’t live for your spouse anymore. You stop caring and ultimately stop trying.
In my opinion the greatest danger to marriage is simply falling out of like. A couple can endure staying together for love and expectations of church, family, and oneself. Ironically they may still have great love for each other they just don’t like each other anymore.
How do you combat this? If it’s not too late you better make your spouse your best friend again. It may not include a great deal of intimacy or sex at first. You may need to get back to dating again. May require giving up some things or a lot of things. You may have to apologize and bury the ego. Whatever you need to do make sure you have done everything possible before you give up. Often people make excuses and play the blame game all too well. Speaking as a woman our feelings are tender. We look to our husbands as our protectors and if we have fallen out of like with you and you have violated our trust it will take time to win our hearts back. Men think very differently. Here is a reality that may be hard to swallow but it’s true. Men lack patience, they demand much, sometimes feel entitled because you work hard. Take those and mix them all together and it makes selfishness. To fix a marriage you have to give up selfishness. Let consistency and patience allow for time to heal. Women can be selfish to but often when the situation reaches this bad place we are simply dealing with a broken heart and scared.
I am just sharing this because it seems so many that follow my blog are or have fallen out of like. You cannot expect to live happily ever after if you don’t like each other. Love is not enough. You can fix it but it’s much harder to win a friend the second time. You will never stay in like if you don’t continue to do the things that caused you to like each other in the first place. I feel very grateful that my husband is fun, takes me on dates, to the temple, surprises me, shares secrets, and I like him. Don’t “grow” up into unhappy relationships in servitude to kids, work, church, and anything else that would drive a wedge between you and your best friend. When your spouse is consistently treated as a low priority the wedge will happen. Best wishes to those in like. Stay that way. Best wishes to those that are trying to fix things. My prayers are with you. For those that lost the battle you can still be kind and a friend. Do it. Don’t hate…the world and your kids need kindness. You will discover joy in your own life whenever you practice kindness.